This pig loves lipstick

How many ways can we modify, twist, bake, sprout, compress, ferment, or add things to wheat . . . and make it not wheat or make it harmless, maybe even healthy?

Can we somehow subject wheat flour to lactic acid fermentation, for instance, to make sourdough bread and disable the lectins in wheat that provoke abnormal intestinal permeability, inflammation, and block cholecystokinin? Or completely reverse the autoimmune-initiating effect of gliadin? Or the calcium-, magnesium-, iron-, or zinc-binding effects of phytates that cause you to lose all these minerals into the toilet?

Can we sprout the seeds, as they do with Ezekiel Bread, and rid the wheat of gliadin protein that stimulates appetite?

Is there a way to compress the flour as a wrap to prevent the sudden surge of blood sugar to high levels provoked by the amylopectin A of wheat?

If we avoid use of herbicides and pesticides and declare wheat “organic,” does that mean the gluten, gliadin, amylopectin A, and lectins are disabled?

The answers are no, no, no, and no. We can no more change the basic genetics and biochemistry of wheat by these methods than we can put a pilot’s hat and wings on a chimpanzee and expect him to fly a 747. A chimpanzee is a chimpanzee, no matter how good he looks in a blue uniform, and wheat is wheat no matter how smartly you dress it up.

These are the tortured manipulations that people go through, however, in order to preserve the flow of the gliadin-derived opioid peptides that addict them. See through these shenanigans and enjoy magnificent grain-free health, the way humans were supposed to be all along.